The number one confidence killer?
Negative self-talk.
Negative self-talk kills confidence.
Statements like:
- I’m so stupid!
- I’m an imposter.
- I can’t handle this.
- Wish I were invisible.
- My work is a disaster.
- I’m not good enough.
- I screwed up big time!
- I don’t deserve the praise.
- I look so stupid right now!
- What if they don’t like me?
- I should have not tried this.
- I am never going to make it.
- I don’t know what I’m doing.
- I’m not as smart as they think.
only diminish your self-worth and end up eroding your confidence.
Guilty of any of the above?
Please pause for a second and review the list again.
Are you using any negative statements when talking to yourself?
or
Are you labeling yourself stupid, an imposter, not good enough?
Previous hurt, trauma or negative past experiences may have taught you that:
- you don’t matter
- you don’t belong
- you’re not worthy
- you’re not lovable
- you’re not good enough
Still, it’s up to you to not let the past define you.
The past is behind you and you can’t change it anymore. What you can change is how you interpret the past.
It’s up to you to change the narrative and empower yourself.
You can choose to interrupt the negative thought patterns and upgrade the way you talk to yourself.
So… where do you start?
Here are 2 easy steps to turn the negative self-talk around:
- Pay attention to what you’re saying to yourself
- Whenever you catch yourself saying something belittling or using negative labels:
- ask: does this serve me?
- affirm: I am the one who can change the way I talk to myself. I choose to talk to myself in a kind, positive, empowering way.
- re-frame: correct the negative statement with empowering, supportive words, like:
- I can do this
- I am enough
- I deserve the reward
- I am capable and willing
- I can ask for help if I need it
- I am not there yet, but working on it!
If you have any other statements that resonate with you, even better! Use whatever words you need to hear, to feel empowered, adequate and supported.
Because the most important words you’ll ever hear, are the words you tell yourself.
The more you repeat steps 1 and 2, the sooner you can turn your negative-self talk around.
The way you talk to yourself, is up to you – so why not make it a positive experience?
Remember:
You can interrupt the negative self-talk before it damages your confidence.